If I could rewind my life

When I was a small girl I had a wish …… do any body know what it was?  it was to forward my life as possible  as I could ….because I wanted to become  big so.. fast that ,I could have  long hair like my mother and to wear sari  like her  …..  It was a long desire for me ….. but as  time passed as years went on  my wish  under gone a big change …… a tremendous change  … instead of forwarding my life I wished  if I could rewind it .

I have a solid reason for this wish it a story….

 When I was studying in fourth class we had a teacher called sujatha  .. we all loved her even though she was strict in her class. Her subject was maths , the subject I hated the most ..so during her classes  i used to be in a different   world  , dreaming .  sujatha miss never scolded me for doing so ,but she gave me  punishment such as impositions , rasing the hands up and standing  ect ….

. Then too I continued the same deeds which I had  ... I think it hurted    her much but during those times I was not at a stage to understand her feelings, as I was small. When I got passed to fifth I came to know that sujatha miss left our school ….   But I didn’t feel sad about it …

. And as time passed when I reached to 9^th class I got a letter from sujatha miss ….I didn’t expect her to send a letter to me … but while reading it tears came rolling from my eyes. She said

“Dear chitra , I  know that you will be angry with me now too for giving you such hard punishments at those times . I did so because I loved you and I wanted to see you at the top position …. But you never listened to me ….. I feel happy to know that you have secure a good position in school by now but I don’t have the luck to see that .. any ways may god bless you dear child …. For give me if you can

                    -sujatha –

my hands  started shaking I realized my mistake , I felt sorry for what I did. Carrying this letter I ran to  nimmi miss who was in contact with sujatha miss  .i asked nimmi miss if she knew her address or phone number but, she too wasn’t informed about her new home address or phone number  .i felt sad …. I felt my heart heavy. for some days her thoughts haunted me  , I tried  my best to get her address or phone number  but I failed …… but  my miss remained in my heart for ever

After two year when I got passed to 11^th class a news in the paper really pricked my heart … my miss left this world as she was affected  by cancer …. For a minute I felt   as if world was revolving around me. I wasn’t able to talk.. I was really shocked …

Now too when I remember her my eyes will be filled with tear …

If I could rewind my life ….  I could beg a sorry from her for what I did, and to say I too love you a lot as you did ……. If I could rewind my life ,………